Time to Move On: 9 Signs He’s Not Into You

signs he's not into you

Realizing that a man is not interested in you is almost always a painful experience. It is especially hurtful once you get emotionally attached, in which case rejection can be heartbreaking. However, then you think about it a little, and you realize that the signs he’s not into you were there all along, and you just missed them.

To avoid something like that happening again, this article will list out all those hints that you might be missing. From the subtle to the glaringly obvious, here are all the signs he’s not into you.

1. He Takes a Long Time to Reply


Think about texting your crush for a second. You probably get excited as soon as they text and can’t wait to reply. You’re smiling the whole time and overthinking every word they send, trying to flirt back, or just talking about random things.

Now, the description above is not just true for you. In fact, it is true for most people who have a crush on someone or are just starting to date. Though they might not want to admit it, it is true for guys as well. They get just as excited and smiley once a girl they like texts them, and they reply as soon as it happens (if they are physically able to).

Thus, if you are texting a guy and he’s taking ages to reply without any actual reason, you can assume that he’s just not that into you. If the replies are not just late but also dry and short, you can be sure he doesn’t want anything serious. Let it go, and find someone whose whole face will light up the second they see your name pop up on their screen!

2. You’re Always Initiating Contact First

Another sign he’s not into you is the fact that you are the only one initiating contact. It could include anything from texting first to asking to meet up first. If that is what you have to do in order to see or talk to a guy, he definitely does not like you.

While some men might be shy and require for you to take the lead, none will just let you be the only one to initiate contact. Think about all your communication carefully. If you don’t talk if you don’t text first, it is time to look for something better.

3. He Never Asks You Questions

All women have met at least one man that did all the talking on a date. He told you all about himself, what he likes and dislikes, but somewhere along the way, you noticed that you didn’t get a chance to say anything at all.

If a man truly likes you, he will want to know everything there is to know about you. He will listen attentively and commit what you say to his memory. He will also ask you random questions, all in the hope of getting to know you as well as possible.

On the other hand, there are men who just don’t want any type of serious connection, which is why they don’t bother to ask you much. Alternatively, they might be narcissistic and just want to talk about themselves all night long.

Either way, you deserve better. Do not wait to get attached to such men, and cut them loose as soon as you can.

4. He’s Often Late or Cancels on You


Someone who likes you and wants to spend time with you will always try to be on time and respect what you agree on. Of course, unexpected things can always come up, and cancellations can happen from time to time. However, if they happen constantly and your guy is late all the time, it is simply a sign of disrespect.

Such behavior points to the fact that you are not a priority to him. Furthermore, it means that he does not respect your time and the time you spend together at all. Those types of guys are also more likely to ghost you for no reason, which is another type of heartbreak entirely.

So, if your man does all of the above and it seems like he is never truly available, you can take it as one of the clearest signs he’s not into you. Move on, and find something better!

5. He Keeps Your Relationship a Secret

Don’t take this the wrong way. There is indeed some fun and delight in keeping things private in the beginning. You feel the thrill of sneaking around and enjoying something new just between the two of you. It’s something that most people prefer to do anyway.

However, if your boyfriend refuses to tell his friends about you and is too adamant about keeping you a secret, you can assume that something is wrong. Do not assume the same about family, though. That can be a sensitive topic, and most people are not ready for those kinds of introductions for a while.

All in all, if your boyfriend is refusing to introduce you to his friends and if you realize they don’t even know you exist, you have to confront him. Ask him about it and let him explain. In case the explanation makes no sense, and it’s just random excuses, you should consider moving on. If he doesn’t want you in his life all the way, he doesn’t deserve to have you at all.

6. He Wants a Casual Relationship

Before going into this sign, it is important to establish one fact. There is nothing wrong with casual relationships as long as both people involved want one and respect each other’s boundaries. If you want to keep things casual and find a guy who wants the same, this sign is not for you.

However, if you are talking to a guy and starting to fall in love, and he says he only wants a casual fling, you need to be careful. It could be that he’s just not ready to be exclusive yet and needs to date you casually for a while longer. Those scenarios happen, and his mind might change with time as he gets to know you.

But if you’ve been seeing each other for months and he’s still insisting he only wants a casual thing, you should believe him. He wants to keep looking, and he wants to see other people. The relationship you want cannot fit into that at all, meaning that you have to move on.

Letting go of such a relationship in time is important. That way, you won’t get too attached. You will also give yourself the chance to find someone who wants the same things you do. Though moving on might be painful at first, it is what you have to do for your happiness.

7. He Is Overly Secretive and Distant


Do not let romance novels fool you. There is nothing breathtaking about a guy who doesn’t seem to care about you and doesn’t let you in. These things simply mean that he isn’t really interested in pursuing a serious relationship with you.

Though you might think that you could change him with time, that usually doesn’t happen. You will only hurt yourself in the process, and he will remain distant and emotionally unavailable. As much as you might love him or want to be with him, it is not your job to act as a therapist.

If he keeps refusing to open up and won’t ever say how he feels, you should move on. You deserve someone who would at least try to be as open with you as he can. If that is not possible with the guy you’re currently with, it will be with someone else.

8. He Refuses to Try Doing Things That You Like

Let’s face it: no one can like the exact same things that you do. You and your boyfriend might like different music, enjoy different movies, and have different hobbies.

However, all of that should not mean that you can’t at least try to enjoy something the other likes. If your guy doesn’t even want to hear about watching one of your favorite movies or constantly talks badly about your taste, he’s definitely not into you.

If he were into you, he’d at least make an effort to see something from your perspective. Even if it is not his cup of tea, he could appreciate it simply because it brings you joy. If he doesn’t, you can take it as a sign that he doesn’t really care that much.

9. You Have an Off Feeling

When it comes to matters of the heart, it is essential to trust your gut. It can help you get out of a bad relationship unlike anything else.

If you are seeing a guy and you constantly have a feeling that he doesn’t like you and that something is wrong, you shouldn’t ignore it. Think about everything carefully, and get some outsider advice as well. If everything is pointing to the fact that you’d be better off alone, then that is what you should do. Even if you feel sad at first, you will be doing yourself a favor in the long run.

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